F3/GONADS – Leatherneck Backblast – 4.21.12 – Plus One
Aye – the Faithful gathered, the shovel flag was planted, and 45 members of the F3 nation put a beat down on the Leatherneck.
Team Petrino + Team Lone Wolf
5.2 miles; 36 obstacles
The Times: Two teams in the top 8 – both sub 60 (only 8 teams finished under 60 minutes = 25% of all sub 60 teams were F3). F3 had five teams in the top 40 (top 3%)
All teams across the line in under 1:25:00 – placing all F3 teams in the top 15% of all Mud Run teams – #STRONG
Mudvergence – It was sweet to see an amalgamation of AG, Mint, Indy, Mustang, Latta, A51, and Isotope converge for 7 hours of bada$$ing & brotherhood and even sweeter to see Dredd lead the ball of man in a pre-race prayer.
Plus One – While the BCS conferences contemplate a modified platform to ensure The Crimson Tide’s opponent on the 2nd Monday of January is appropriate, the Faithful early adopted a +1 format. At some point along the way, Nibbler hard committed but fell thru the cracks – sorry brother. The man posted @ 0500 ready to roll sans a team assignment. His slip thru RW’s kick off count off was a foreshadowing of things to come. Although Nibbler was willing, ready, and able to sit on the bus and drink beer for an hour and a half – Dredd & RW quickly developed a plan to weave him into the fold and launch his arse on the course. The marines never suspected a thing – as Nibb’s old school modified wife beater was well camouflaged with 40 some odd black GONADs race shirts.
Cylon effect – Dredd, having adopted a diet first, exercise second lifestyle for ’12, started the day @ 0430 with a half dozen egg whites, some boiled chicken, and 4 celery stalks. The 48 yr old gristle stack was pushing the pace for team Petrino and taunting team Core while serenading them with lyrics from Rush’s Tom Sawyer @ the mudwater ditch/dirt mound obstacle.
Leatherneck Smoothie – Dino was ready to wet his whistle about 1 mile in @ the underwater log obstacle and thought it would be efficient to take a swaller as he went under log #3. It took about 2 minutes for the parasites to attack and the man was down. While RW and Dredd were hot on Team Core’s blood trail, Blue performed an emotional heimlich maneuver, Dino shook it off and finished strong!.
Abstentions and Asterisks – In an ironic twist, after TD/LK has long admonished the risk averse Pax for abstaining from various elements of the Gauntlet, TD/LK instructed Team Core to skip the dreaded Weaver. Never to shy away from a challenge, Team Petrino hit the Weaver in the mouth, old school style – no assistance necessary. To further the irony, Team Petrino was apparently painted with the abstention brush by a fat fingered score keeper and hit with an undeserved 5 min penalty. No worries – we know who we are.
Meat market – overheard before the race: “Wow, I wish I was on THEIR team.” Quote from a – ahem – well-formed and fit tomatoe of about 28, as she and a friend watched the F3 tide roll past in the parking lot pre-race. We still got it.(Colonel (BHWTU))
– overheard after the race: after a blonde tomato in a range rover paused for 2 min to stare @ the beefcake gathered around the shovel flag, she played it off as though she was trying to get McGee’s attention – “Heyyyy Bobby”
Reptile royalty – On the bus ride to Leatherneck, Dredd provided a running commentary on the Lizard King’s unhuman like characteristics, as the LK himself had just “shut down the system” for a nap while the rest of us were pacing anxiously in the aisle. As Dredd said, he took out the “intensity chip” and plugged in the “sleep chip” into the frontal lobe of his “brain” aka his supercomputer. (5-O)
Finishing strong – The primal screams that teams unleashed at the finish line confirmed our collective Bada$$ery. Hyannis’ was particularly terrifying, and awesome. (5-O)
Faceman – There are pictures of the Colonel floating around that will i) be on the USMC Mud Run web page, ii) scare your children, and iii) make all females with a fetish for roughnecks weak in their knees. (5-O)
Food for thought – Dredd ate the following before the race: 6 eggs (4 yolks, 2 whites), 5 pieces of bacon, 4 lbs of chicken breast, 3 12 oz protein shakes, 2 packages of beef jerkey (no carbs), and yes… a partridge in a pear tree… sorry, the partridge AND the pear tree. For desert, TeamCore served him some humble pie.(5-O)
Misdirection – TeamCore prevailed, despite being flagged by the Marines for special treatment… the best was when they told us to go down the channel on the right, only to be stopped, dragged out of the channel (verbally), and told to trudge through the other channel. Were we not used to Haywood’s mid-WIB change orders, we might have not taken it so well.(5-O)
Audiophiles – TClaps to Sweeper Boy for producing a Mudrun ’12 soundtrack with just a few hours notice and TClaps to Hyannis for supplying the connectivity to unleash his and TD’s playlists.
No Garmins allowed – After the navigation debacle last fall, we went old school and put Crotch Rocket in the captain’s chair. CR, along with his first mate, Mike, delivered us on time after a slight mishap with South Carolina’s finest. The 3 point turn that Mike executed on the backwoods road with our land barge was a masterpiece.
Moleskin from TeamAvianFlu:
Tarzan swing at the beginning created early challenge, look for introduction of Sugar Creek swing at the Uhh A*S*S soon.
All that wall building in his day job certainly prepared Kickin Chickin for the wall climbs, either that or he had suction cups on his gloves.
Black mud – easy to get in, hard to get out.
Badassing aside, the 50 ssh penalty in lieu of te weaver was the greatest gift of the day. Just sayin.
Exeter’s proclamation that while pink eye was not fatal, it should be expected after pushing through the first mudhole.
Kickin Chickin asking the Marine manning the Tarzan Swing “if that was all he had?” after requiring penalty exercises of merkens, crunches and mountain climbers. The Marine’s reply: “On your backs. Feet six inches off the ground. Hold ‘em”. Respect given. Respect earned.
Able’s nimbleness on display on the rope walk, bounding through with the effectiveness of a mountain sheep traversing a narrow ledge. Speaking of Able, did any see his Space Ace Frehley impression after receiving a face full of black mud in the Pit? Expect Able to introduce some air guitar riffs from Rock ‘n Roll All Nite
BlackBird telling a Marine “I’m going to get a shovel” after the Marine asked where BB was going after he stepped over a log that he was suppose to go under. Any one else notice that several of the under logs were just too low this year? Anyone?
Exeter’s impression of Hitman’s “this is bullshxx” when swimming in, err, bullshxx.
Did any one else catch an eye full from one of the women teams sharing the community shower? Eyes diverted. Not really. Good mammeries, excuse me, I mean memories.
Team Divine took a moment near the end of the race, coming out of the long “mud” trough for a blessing. The Bishop stopped us all for a moment of silence to remind us, as he marked us with the sign of the cross, that we are cow manure, and to cow manure we will return. Or did he say ashes? The aroma from the trough threw me off.(Moses)
We survived old age, flaring asthma, and a serious lack of height to finish in the 1:10-and-change F3 pack along with fellow Gonads sporting bib #s 12, 14 and 16. Our own mini ball o’ man at the finish line. (Hyannis)
Bib #11 was really a simple exercise. We chased Rook for 5+ miles over walls and under logs. The only time we failed to follow our leader was making our way down the creek when Rook unpacked the bishop to make a quick splash. (DW)